طلب تصحيح ترجمة للتدريب- نص حول الإسعافات الأولية

Question

هذا النص وترجمته من العربية إلى الإنجليزية. أرجو من المتطوعين في الموقع المساعدة في تصحيح الترجمة.

بُنيت المعابد المصرية لعبادة الآلهة وللاحتفال بالفراعنة في مصر القديمة وفي المناطق الخاضعة للسلطة المصرية. وكان يُنظر للمعابد على أنها بيت الآلهة أو الملوك الذين خصصت لهم. وداخل هذه المعابد أدى المصريون الطقوس الدينية المختلفة، وتلك الطقوس هي الوظائف الأساسية في الديانة المصرية مثل: تقديم القرابين للآلهة، وإعادة تمثيل تفاعلاتهم الخرافية خلال احتفالاتهم، وإبعاد القوى الفوضوية. وكانت تلك الطقوس ضرورية للاستمرار في الحفاظ على الماعت، وهوالنظام الإلهي للكون. وكان بناء المعابد ورعاية الآلهة من مهام الفراعنة، الذين كرسوا بذلك موارد ضخمة لبناء المعابد وصيانتها.ولقد أناب الفراعنة مجموعة من الكهنة للقيام بمعظم واجباتهم في تلك الطقوس لما في ذلك من ضرورة، ولكن معظم العامة واجهوا الاقصاء من المشاركة المباشرة في الاحتفالات، والمنع من دخول المناطق المقدسة من المعبد. وبالرغم من ذلك كان المعبد مركزًا دينيًا مهمًا للمصريين من الطبقات الاجتماعية كافة؛ فكانوا يتوجهون إليه لأداء الصلاة، وتقديم القرابين، ولطلب الإرشاد الحكيم من الإله الكامن في المعبد.

الترجمة

In ancient Egypt, temples were built in regions under Egyptian control for purposes like worshiping gods and celebrating the pharaohs, as well as being homes dedicated for the gods and the kings. Inside these temples, Egyptians performed variety of religious rituals such as delivering offerings, reenacting their mythical interactions during their celebrations and repelling the forces of chaos. These rituals were the core functions in Egyptian religion, and they were essential to safeguard Ma’at, the order of cosmos as well. It was Pharaohs’ obligation to build temples and care for gods, they allocated therefore huge resources to construct temples and to make sure that all of them kept in good state. While a group of priests were acting on behalf of Pharaohs in most of their duties in those necessary rituals, most of the common citizens were banned from sharing directly in ceremonies and prohibited from entering the holy areas in the temple. Despite, the temple was a significant religious center for all Egyptian classes so they were heading there to perform prayers, to give offerings, and to seek wisdom guidance from the god dwelling within.

Answer 1

Light edits
In ancient Egypt, temples were built in Egypt and other regions under Egyptian control worshiping gods and celebrating the pharaohs, as well as being homes dedicated for the gods and the kings. Inside these temples, Egyptians performed a variety of rituals such as delivering offerings, reenacting their mythical interactions during their celebrations and repelling the forces of chaos. Those rituals were the core functions in Egyptian religion, and they were essential to safeguard Ma’at, the order of cosmos as well. It was Pharaohs’ obligation to build temples and care for gods, for which reason they allocated huge resources to construct temples and to make sure that all of them were kept in a good state. While Pharos assigned most ritual services to a group of priests as deemed necessary, the common subjects were excluded from participating directly in ceremonies and were prohibited from entering the sacred places of the temple. Nevertheless, an Egyptian temple was an important religious center for all Egyptian strata so they would head there to perform prayers, to give offerings, and to seek wisdom guidance from the god dwelling therein.

Edited
Ancient Egyptian temples, whether in Egypt or in other regions under its control, were used to worship gods, commemorate pharaohs, and serve as homes for gods and Pharaohs. In these temples, Egyptians performed rituals such as delivering offerings, reenacting mythical interactions during their celebrations, and repelling forces of chaos. Apart from being core functions of Egyptian religion, those rituals were also important to preserve Ma'at, the cosmic order. It was the duty of Pharaohs to build temples and maintain gods, which is why they allocated an enormous amount of resources to the construction of temples and to ensuring that they were maintained in good condition. While Pharos assigned most ritual duties to priests, the common subjects were excluded from participating directly in ceremonies and prohibited from entering the temple's sacred spaces. The Egyptian temples, however, were religious centers for the entire Egyptian society, and people would pray there, make offerings, and seek wisdom guidance from the gods living there.